Tears escape, one by one, two or three Threatening to wipe out my very existence Existence of resistance that I have kept in touch for so long Through death, though heart breaks a plenty Two or three more in their escape My fortitude buckling underneath Waves of lava lulling beneath So grateful of all the lessons learned And the near-death times two that ensured My purpose on this God given Earth Yet chaos abounds this last year as a bigger, fused purpose arises This trust-so deep, my Faith-so deep But so damn lost, so damn numb on the surface My heart aches, aches so deep I can feel the squeeze from my heart to my toes Wrapping around my core, up and down, an on repeat No booze, no pot, nothing to bury it deep Faith in knowing that I must face this pain Embrace it, hold it close, so I can let it fly free To a place that will serve me Watching, feeling, this slippery slope, my heels dug in strong Rectifying all past mistakes Boundaries in place where there was so much wrong Yes-hello to taking back any power as I am awake No denial in that which I so willingly gave Or that so much of me can break Resolve in building, repairing, regaining strength That pushes me on, through and through An endless energy, the infinite Source As this phoenix rises, hugging my heart, Hugging my soul Consoling and soothing in all that I need I embrace, I surrender
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